ACCESSIBILITY - WHO KNEW IT’S SUCH A BIG DEAL..
I was planning my birthday and didn’t really want to do anything. Other than working and sleeping I’ve been a complete hermit of late. My eldest daughter visited from Brighton a few weeks prior and was adamant I needed to go out. Off we go to the mobility centre to hire a transit wheelchair. The chap in store kindly wheeled around the ‘hire chair’ I took one look at it and rather like a scene from ‘Little Britain’ I pointed to a chair and said, ‘I want that one’. It was racing green and compact not for hire but for sale. I climbed into said chair and that was it, ‘I’ll have this one please’. ‘Do you not want to try a larger one?’, ‘is this for a child?’ I replied. ‘No, its for slim people’, the chap said. Jokingly I replied ‘are you saying my bum looks big in this?’ After much embarrassed laughter, well that was it, sold! The wheelchair was duly loaded into the boot of my car and off we go into town (Cambridge).
Fast forward a couple of weeks and its Easter, my birthday being April Fool’s Day which also fell on Easter Monday. I’m being harassed by my family to decide about lunch/dinner. Now this is the part, which is so super annoying, accessibility! I thought let’s go to the Ivy it says it’s accessible – yeah that’s if you go around the back. Then I thought ok Sticks n Sushi, same thing back entrance only. Now being a bit of a Prima Dona, no way was I going to go ‘around the back’. Maybe it’s just me but it feels so derogatory to be told ‘sure you are welcome but please use the back entrance’. Pah!
Anyway, Easter arrives, and my youngest daughter takes me into Cambridge for some retail therapy. There I am hair done, makeup done, nice outfit, shades on and feeling pretty good about myself. We hit Zara and I already have two dresses and a two-piece outfit in my basket, guess what we want to go upstairs. The shop is busy, expected, the lift is roped off, not expected. We asked a floor assistant if it was possible to use the lift the answer was of course ‘No’. I instructed my daughter to park me somewhere out of the way and go up herself. She was of course reticent about leaving me, but I insisted. Now sitting in a wheelchair in a busy Zara unable to move yourself was an experience. Whenever anyone came near me, I was ‘oh please feel free to move me out of the way’. It was as if I was speaking Klingon or something with the quizzical looks I got.
We then go to Lush to buy some of their lovely soap. Another busy store and all was fine, it’s funny because I could never shop on my own now, I wouldn’t be able to reach any of the counters. You don’t really think about practicalities of anyone less mobile until you are, I guess. Then upon exiting a raft of people were entering, I found myself in the path of a woman who looked at me first with what can only be described as disgust turning to pity. My daughter even commented ‘did you see the way that lady looked at you?’ I replied, ‘yep I thought I had lipstick on my teeth.’ You do notice people looking at you differently and it’s certainly not the looks I used to get walking down Camden High Street in my twenty’s. I don’t think people are consciously aware they are doing it when they look at me in a chair. I don’t believe anyone is thinking ill of me they are probably just wondering what is wrong with me. And that’s the rub nothing is ‘wrong ‘ with me I just happen to have a neurological illness which means my walking and balance are for want of a better word shot to sh**e.
I don’t wish for this article to seem negative its just what happened. I had two great days spending time with my children and getting out. In the main people are very nice and accommodating. We all live in our own worlds, and I truly have the upmost respect for anyone with a disability and how they must navigate life. My birthday ended up being fabulous as we went to ‘Giggling Squid’, access was great, staff were great and I even had a few glasses of wine, it felt normal. So, embracing my ‘new normal’ has actually begun, its just taken me six years ;)
